It Is What It Is

Then their father Israel said to them, "If it must be, then do this: Put some of the best products of the land in your bags and take them down to the man as a gift—a little balm and a little honey, some spices and myrrh, some pistachio nuts and almonds. Take double the amount of silver with you, for you must return the silver that was put back into the mouths of your sacks. Perhaps it was a mistake. Take your brother also and go back to the man at once. And may God Almighty grant you mercy before the man so that he will let your other brother and Benjamin come back with you. As for me, if I am bereaved, I am bereaved." (Genesis 43:11-14)

It is what it is. As I grow older, and hopefully wiser, I’ve found deep comfort in that little phrase. It is what it is. I used to consider such thinking was giving up, resignation or tossing in the towel. Nope. I believed it could be detrimental, deceptive and even destructive. Boy, was I wrong. It is what it is. Until I recognized this truth, I lived a life of worry, regret, frustration, anger and sadness.

In truth, those five words—all of only twelve letters—are the key to personal freedom. They don’t announce resignation, but rather release. It’s not tossing in the towel or waving the white flag, but rather an acceptance of assignment. You’re not quitting. No, in fact, you’re just getting started. It’s the recognition there’s more work, more pain, more crisis. It is what it is. You can’t change it (right now). You just have to live through it.

Jacob’s youthful zeal had evolved into elderly wisdom. He knew which fights to pick and which hills to die upon. He wasn’t going to beat the famine. It is what it is. He couldn’t bring Joseph back from the dead. It is what it is. He couldn’t rescue Simeon or buy more food without allowing beloved Ben to leave. It is what it is. A paraphrase of that sentiment is wrapped in his comment: “As for me, if I am bereaved, I am bereaved.” Whatever you do, don’t see Jacob's words as a sign he's quitting or giving up. If that was Jacob’s mindset, he'd have done nothing and starved to death, leaving Simeon to rot in Egypt and his family to fend for themselves. If resignation were his rationale, then he’d never let young Ben leave. He'd have covered his assets and called it good, not give away the family fortune in silver and spices.

No, Jacob had learned the value of acceptance. It is what it is. Life isn’t always fair, nice, generous, reasonable or timely. It is what it is. Stuff happens. Things break. People get hurt. Sometimes its bleak and we face fights, foreclosures, fires and floods or divorce, debt, disease and death. It is what it is. Sometimes life smiles on you. The wallet is thick. Friends are many. The weather is sunny and 75. Not a cloud in the sky, except to shade just when you start to sweat. The secret to life is acceptance. It's in the vows. In good or bad, rich or poor, sickness or health, it is what it is. You can’t change it, only roll with it. Like an ocean tide you can choose to surf or sit, dare or drown, smile or sulk. It is what it is. Happiness is fleeting but joy is eternal. At this moment, as I write these words, my air conditioning is broke and the temperature outside is climbing near the triple digits. It is what it is. At least I still have cold water, ice cream and sprinklers.

In a nutshell, accept life, come what may. Live each day as if it’s your last (you never know). Don’t fake your pain, but never let the pain break you. The sun will still come up tomorrow, you can bet on it.

It is what it is. Enough said.


NOTABLE QUOTABLES ON ACCEPTING LIFE:

Every moment of light and dark is a miracle. (Walt Whitman)

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. (Joseph Campbell)

Life is what happens to you, when you're busy making other plans! (John Lennon)

Never forget that you are one of a kind. Never forget that if there weren't any need for you in all your uniqueness to be on this earth, you wouldn't be here in the first place. And never forget, no matter how overwhelming life's challenges and problems seem to be, that one person can make a difference in the world. In fact, it is always because of one person that all the changes that matter in the world come about. So be that one person. (Buckminster Fuller)

Father, I thank You this Day alone. It is what it is, because You ordained it. My problems and pain are merely temporary situations in light of Eternity. And so for this Day I choose to accept the lot You have given to me. It is what it is. I won’t argue or complain, I’ll just be thankful. Help me to be content. Help me to accept life as it comes. Help me to roll with the punches so I might soar with the eagles. Amen.